Q: Why does your website look so primitive?

Listen…. When Orcus the Vile proclaims he is bored, he expects his acolytes to bring him diversion. And what does he do when they slam two hinged, stainless steel slabs with a half-eaten fruit on it in front of him? What should he do when they say “this is a computer”? But one lifetime ago computers were mechanical calculators that made more noise than the eruption of krakatoa. Give me some time and have patience.

Q: Are you human?

I’m fairly certain I have some human blood in me. Then again, I don’t know what was in that goblet. It certainly didn’t taste like dragon blood.

Q: What kind of games do you play?

Little known fact: the magic format two-headed giant was named after my dark master Imperator Bar’bar. We were an unstoppable team in Magic the Gathering, all four of us.

Q: Do you have an ego?

At a certain age, you too will realize you’re better than everybody else. Whether or not that’s true, you will feel better when you lie down in your grave. Since I do it every night, I must adjust my ego accordingly.

Q: What is the Winged Serpent Cabal?

There is no cabal.